IF YOU WENT TO SAN DIEGO COMIC CON OR KNOW ANYONE WHO HAS, PLEASE READ.
One of my dearest friends was found on the side of the road, unconscious and bloody. She was wearing this cosplay on the day it happened. She was last seen with friends when she ran off after a disagreement. Please, please, please, if you have ANY information or saw her anywhere, contact her mother. The full information is down below. This isn’t okay and it’s sickening to know that this happened at a place people truly can enjoy themselves. Please spread the word.
”I just received a call from the San Diego Police Department and my daughter Emily Weyer aka Milly Makara was found on the side of the road covered in blood with no ID unconscious. They are unsure what happened to her. My husband is on his way to the police station and then the hospital. If you have any information on what happened to her please send me a facebook message or call me at 951 229 3394. Thank you in advance”. -JILL WEYER
Jesus fucking christ people stop being utter bags of shit.
I’m seeing a bunch of people come forward in notes of this post, tags and reblogs, talking about their own experience and especially talking about the last tweet. This last tweet seems to hit people hard and while I can’t talk about bad things right now I can talk about how to get rid of them….
The ‘A Few Short Words’ series is a place where we talk about games that we may have missed the boat on reviewing, but they’re not old enough to be a retrospective. An inbetweeny article, if you will. ANYWAY!
Zero Escape: Virtue’s Last Reward is an interesting beast. An indirect sequel to niche visual novel 9 Hours, 9 Persons, 9 Doors (a game so niche it wasn’t even released in Europe) for the DS, Virtue’s Last Reward was released worldwide in 2012, right in the middle of the 3DS’ early-life game drought (and, incidentally, became one of the first genuinely interesting titles for Vita).
999, following on as it did from games like the Ace Attorney series of visual novels, was rather well received, thanks in part to ‘worldwide distribution’ via DS rom downloads and R4 carts. 999 stars Junpei, one of a cast of 9 characters, each of which have a numbered bracelet attached to their wrist and a hidden backstory. The 9 are forced to play a deadly game of ‘find the exit’ by Zero, the mastermind behind their kidnapping, lest they explode violently from playing the game wrong – oh, yeah: the bracelets pack an explosive charge – or drown from being on the boat for more than the titular 9 hours. It’s revealed very early that Zero is one of the nine, leading to an atmosphere of suspicion from the word go. Why is that guy acting so suspicious? Who’s the girl with the red hair, and why does she seem so familiar with the game? What’s the deal with this Santa dude – he seems remarkably unphased by the time limit or explosives. 999 had 6 endings (although only two are mandatory to get the true ending) but each reveals more about the characters who are costarring, creating a great sense of immersion. 999 also has one of the most interesting stories in all of games – full of twists and red herrings from start to finish – that most developers could learn an awful lot from.
Virtue’s Last Reward is 999′s follow-up title. Linked to 999 but not a direct sequel, it follows another group of 9 trapped in a strange facility with bracelets on their wrist. The player, this time, is Sigma, a young college student. He’s abducted in a similar fashion as in the first game and thrown into another game of escape. This time the deaths aren’t quite so gruesome – if you don’t play the game, you don’t explode – but the outcome is the same. VLR does everything bigger than 999, with 24 endings, more characters in total, a completely mind-bending plot, and a girl who, somehow, seems to be able to jump twenty feet in the air.
The best thing about this series is how there’s no reliance on hocus-pocus rubbish or ‘a wizard did it’ handwaves. If you’re into your sci-fi, you’ll love Zero Escape, because every concept that is raised, every seemingly unexplainable happening, is completely grounded in scientific principles (usually physics). Virtue’s Last Reward, for example, contains sections on medical imaging, quantum mechania, and even implications of worldwide disasters. The series doesn’t shy away from telling difficult stories, either, with many characters having hidden depths and traumas.
Virtue’s Last Reward is easily one of my favourite games of recent times. It’s complex sci-fi with a heavy lean on the sci, a wordy mess of ideas that has you guessing the whole way through. I thrashed through the nigh-30 hours of content in but a few days, constantly bothering twitter pal @wanyal with my theories about who is whom, where and when the game takes place, what the deal is with various subtle points, and so on. The best thing about this is that when the reveal finally arrived, it pieced together a lot of what I’d already guessed, while filling in the gaps and correcting a few bits that didn’t quite fit right. This is A REALLY GOOD THING TO DO because IT MAKES THE PLAYER FEEL SMART but ALSO GIVES THE WRITERS THE SATISFACTION OF A BIG REVEAL.Take note, games writers.
A word of warning, though – while it may not seem obvious at first, 999 and VLR are networked together to an immense extent. If you’re interested in the series, I’d highly recommend trying to pick up a copy of 999 first (the DS was region free, so the American version will work anywhere), or, if all else fails, emulating it or downloading the rom to put on a DS flashcart. Then dive into VLR and have an absolute belter of a time.
Second word of warning: Virtue’s Last Reward ends on a colossal hook for a sequel that, as of right now, is on hold. So be prepared to be outraged when you get to that point.
ZELDA’S BACK, BABY *rapturous applause*.
Because of the current hubbub about Link’s gender in the trailer, I’m referring to them as male purely because that’s what Link’s always been up to now. I’d love to play as a female Link, though!
So, Nintendo had a pretty good E3, right? Let’s talk about the best bit of it – that thirty seconds of super sexy Zelda gameplay we saw.
HERE’S THAT ONE SCREENSHOT THAT WE ALSO USED FOR THE FEATURED IMAGE (click for embiggening)
Right then, let’s fire up the analysis machine. I could talk for ages about this screenshot, but luckily, Midnight Resistance’s Andi Hamilton has already done the work for me. What I will say, though, is this: that landscape looks awfully like the general layout of underwater Hyrule from Wind Waker – from a different position in the world. If we look to the far distance, in the middle of the image, there appears to be a few spires, and to the right, a body of water. Could it be that that area is actually the one below, from Wind Waker? (This is a view never seen in the game, but is in fact an image taken with a free camera mod).
Of course this isn’t conclusive. But it should be noted that very few of the previous Zeldas have featured a particularly mountainous Hyrule – the only one that has being Wind Waker. There’s a few other links, too, including the art style. I’d pitch that the new Zelda isn’t built on the Wind Waker HD engine (itself just a port of the Gamecube’s Mario Sunshine/Zelda engine), but it’s clear Aonuma’s taken a LOT of cues from Wind Waker HD’s style. Let’s have a look!
Flat colours! Some detailing, but not too much! Lots of brightness! Cel shading! It’s 1) beautiful and 2) very Wind Waker. Also: that shirt. Link’s not in his traditional green tunic, which is weird in itself, but notably in a sky-blue top with white detailing, which will be familiar to anyone who played a significant amount of Link’s Gamecube outing.
Now, I’m not saying this game is a sequel to The Wind Waker. I’m saying it’s a prequel, with ties to another fan favourite game.
Wind Waker starts with a hefty load of exposition, that handily explains the events of Ocarina of Time and afterward. Wind Waker takes place in the ‘Child Link’ timeline – i.e. the one where Link gets sent back in time to live as a kid again, but instead fucks off to look for Navi. The events of Majora’s Mask occur – a game based heavily around bereavement and loss, and the realisation that you can’t ever save everyone in a single 3 day cycle. Between Ocarina and Wind Waker, Ganon rises again, but is not defeated – rather, King Daphnes locks Hyrule below the ocean, drowning a huge majority of the Hylian population.
What if Zelda U is about Link failing to defeat Ganon? Nintendo’s been dropping heavy Majora’s Mask references recently, with significant hints in A Link Between Worlds (notably the Dark World fanatics wear very Majora-style masks themselves, plus there’s the mask itself in Link’s house), Aonuma talking about the game a lot, and Zelda Williams carrying a model of Majora’s Mask on stage at the Smash invitational. MM was about a number of various dark themes, but chief among them was the hopelessness the moon represented.
I wouldn’t be surprised if that’s a central theme for the new game. If we’re told at the start that the game takes place before Wind Waker, then we know that we are doomed to lose. A true convention breaker, since this title is all about that, according to Aonuma. The entire game centred around that one fact – that this Link is not the Hero of Time, that he cannot defeat Ganon, only weaken him enough to set up the events of Wind Waker. How amazing would that be?
Anyway, enough of that theorising. Let’s talk about other parts of that trailer.
If I had any clue what the hell this thing is I’d tell you. It might be a robot? But it could also be organic? It looks like it’s got plants actually growing on it, so it must be pretty old. It shoots lasers and stuff and makes things burst into dynamic-light-source-flames, which looks awesome. It also destroys parts of the environment – could Zelda U be going all Battlefield on us with Levolution?* We just don’t know! And this time I don’t even have any wild theories! MOVING ON.
This is some kind of light arrow thing. As GameXplain pointed out, Link actually pulls a trigger to ‘turn it on,’ and it seems to be an extra special type of arrow, because it’s not kept in his quiver. This confuses matters even further – is this a Hyrule with futuristic technology, meaning that thing COULD be a robot, and those lasers it fires actually sci-fi lasers and not magic lasers? UGH AONUMA YOU’RE NOT ANSWERING ANY QUESTIONS HERE.
I’m tired now, but much like Smash’s reveal last year, Aonuma’s 30 seconds of Zelda gameplay has more to discuss than any damned CG trailer most of the other companies showed. I’m already dying to see and hear more. I squealed a bit when that shot of the field came up. Feed me your Zelda heroin, Aonuma. Do it. I love it.
*I’m not even sorry for bringing up this ridiculous marketing term again
Today, much-loved hidden gem PISSMAN received a substantial update for the first time since it’s January 1st, 2013 release, adding a whole new area.
First unveiled to the world on New Year’s Day 2013, PISSMAN was an instant success. Garnering universal critical acclaim (a number of review quotes are provided below this article) and numerous awards (and again), PISSMAN is the work of internet superbeing @davehurricane, and was the first game released byMidnight Resistance’s publishing arm. PISSMAN is completely free, with no microtransactions, yet manages to raise many existential questions and provide hours of gameplay to boot.
You control the titular PISSMAN, a naked, pink man with a huge cyan P tattooed directly on to his chest. PISSMAN moves left and right with the arrow keys, can fly with X, and PISSES with C. This is all the information available to you. It remains unexplained why PISSMAN has the power of flight, or, indeed, why he can PISS indefinitely. Some fans theorise that PISSMAN was exposed to radioactive material as a child, and his flight ability is actually provided by an ultra-pressurised stream of INVISIBLE PISS. This neglects to explain how PISSMAN is able to run faster along the ground than his PISS is able to travel. Rumours of PISSMAN ORIGINS have so far proved unfounded.
The main attraction of PISSMAN is its incredible PISS PHYSICS. PISS is ejected from PISSMAN in large globules, a third the size of his head, and each is realistically modelled with bouncing splash physics and gravity, as a real PISS GLOBULE would be. This PISS can build up, filling the various nooks and crannies of the level, potentially even engulfing PISSMAN himself. Luckily, PISSMAN is able to breathe his own PISS, ensuring he will not die in such an eventuality.
Other theories suggest that PISSMAN is, in fact, a subservient entity of the LORDS OF PISS, godlike beings known to control all PISS in the universe. This would explain his various abilities, including his PISSBREATHING, as well as provide a reason for his existence. There are still so many questions regarding PISSMAN, however. Why does he not wear a costume, like a normal superhero, instead opting for a huge P tattoo? Why does he lack any obvious organs through which his PISS could emerge? We just don’t know.
Anyway, on to the update. PISSMAN’S 24th June, 2014 update adds a whole new corridor to FILL WITH PISS. The official PISSMAN twitter account has shown off a secret area, but it is currently unknown how this area can be reached. Any hints will be featured on this very article ASAP.
If you haven’t checked out PISSMAN, now is the time. With loads of new content to uncover, a myriad questions to answer, and a potential 3D sequel hinted at earlier this year, there’s never been a better time to be a PISSMAN FAN.
Those PISSMAN reviews in full:
“An astounding technical achievement. That PISSMAN can model thousands of PISS particles realistically at a constant 60FPS is a true testament to next-gen technology” – 9/10, Eurogamer
“P***MAN’s orange P*** reminds us of Mtn Dew – could there be a licensing deal in the works?” – 11/10, IGN
“A solid 10/10″ – 7/10, EDGE
Those PISSMAN Awards in full:
Game of the Year 2013: PC Gamer, Rock Paper Shotgun, Videogamer.com, Kotaku, IGN, Eurogamer, myriad others.
Best Use of Colour: Indie Games Foundation
Breakthrough PISS: BAFTA
Fewest Guns While Still Being Enjoyable: IGN